the real reason im a boudoir photographer

This is my journey, and I always preface it with, "This is my story. This is my truth, and this is my life." It's essential to remember that your truth may be different if you were part of my life during that time. I grew up surrounded by women and people who didn't just dislike their bodies; they downright hated them.

My family, including myself, had larger bodies, and the disdain they held for themselves had a significant impact on how I viewed myself. The negativity wasn't limited to self-hate; it extended to a lack of support, love, or empowerment from those around me. It wasn't just that the people in my life despised their bodies; they had partners, family, and friends who echoed these sentiments or didn't offer any support or encouragement.

I can't pinpoint when I first witnessed a genuinely healthy relationship with one's body. It took a long time. Even today, I work with my family, especially my mom, to improve their body image and beliefs about body size. Growing up without anyone around me who loved and accepted their bodies for what they were was challenging.

I find it mind-boggling that I was surrounded by so many women, yet none of them truly loved or accepted their bodies. To grow up in such an environment and witness the constant negativity surrounding body size and shape was perplexing.

It's crazy because I grew up in a family with many women, yet none of them truly loved or accepted their bodies. I still talk to them about it today because it's astonishing. Living in a body – what I call your shell – and not accepting it throughout your life is mind-boggling.

I emphasize this fact to my clients and those in my group: we influence the people around us. If I were to speak negatively about my body or put it down, my son would pick up on that and develop similar thoughts about larger bodies or different body types. It's all interconnected, and that's where my journey began.

I saw this cycle of self-doubt and self-hate, not only in the women around me but also in their partners who failed to empower, support, or love their bodies as they should. They made jokes about people with larger bodies, even if their partner was in a larger body themselves. So much negativity revolved around body shapes and the feeling of unworthiness associated with different sizes and bodies.

Growing up in an environment where self-love was scarce, I knew I didn't want to perpetuate that cycle. I wanted to teach people that they are real, worthy, and that their bodies matter, regardless of their size. They deserve self-love and partners who love, empower, and support them, regardless of their body size or shape.